Monday, March 13, 2006

Some things you don't know about me

And maybe will wish you didn't...

I don't have a huge number of friends. I don't have a moderate number of friends. I have a few friends. These friends are VERY VERY dear to me and important to my way of life, as you can imagine.

I am always looking for new friends. I probably got this from not having very many growing up and wanting to have more connections with people. I am willing to reach out to anyone I meet that has any degree of compatibility, in hobby, in age of children, in location, in spirit, anything, really. I reach out often and am often, well, not rebuffed exactly, but people don't necessarily reach back. Everyone probably has this experience.

Sometimes I take this in stride better than others.

[This post has been heavily edited to remove lots of profanity and a crying jag.]

On the other hand, my other friend is FABULOUS and I can tell her all this stuff and she doesn't judge me. And I have another friend who lives far, far away that would hug me all day if she could and protect me from all harm, I know that. And my DH will stand up for me always. My children are great (loud) and very loving. My life is pretty good right now. I just will never understand people and cruelty and thoughtlessness. I just don't get it. But at least they can't make me be any way I don't want to be. I can stand up for her just the same. But in my heart, Lord, in my heart, I wish it were different.

Thanks for reading this. I admire you for it. Wanna be friends?


Blogger superstahr said...

I am also a person of very few friends and my bestest friend in the world since high school recently moved to Atlanta. *sigh* We keep in touch by email and occasionally by phone now. I didn't read your orginal post so I don't know what happened with your and your friend, but I do know how it feels to have just a few that are near and dear.

6:22 PM  

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